Vintage styled tea party

Today I looked after 5 kids.  Two of my own and three that I borrowed for the day, o.k Mom was working and needed me to watch them, but they really are so good that today felt like a breeze.

 I had the idea a few months back to do a vintage themed tea party photo shoot. I started dreaming up ideas and how it would look ( which is the funnest part of it all don't - cha think?) 

Since I have three beautiful nieces I knew they would make my dreams become reality. Plus I know Mom wanted some new up-dated pictures of them.

 The weather was tempermental today so I didn't think it was gonna work, but early this morning, the clouds parted and we decided last minute to follow through with it. So there we were; 3 girls, and one little boy piled in my bathroom ( as timing would have it, Dion was napping ) dresses were scattered everywhere, make-up was out and the smell of perfume and hairspray filled the room ( I really got my girl fix today )

I didn't have all the ideas I wanted put together, but I'm happy with how they turned out and I must say these little princesses are gorgeous:

I'm kinda in love with this below picture:

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And possibly one of my favourite photos of all time..... wait for it......

Emily is the youngest, and boy does she know it! She has more personality than she knows what to do with. She loves babies and anything that yells out " I'm a girl " She has eyes the colour of the hawaiian ocean and eyelashes that curl and wisp like she's wearing mascara. 

Andrea the middle treasure, who is almost 8.  She is a true  girly - girl like her auntie, who works hard at everything she does and is just a kind girl, who, may I add has the perfect hair;  thick and blonde that can curl or go straight

Rachel is almost 10, who has the most beautiful think eye lashes you have ever seen, who loves animals,  and has a kind, nurturing heart that will take her places in life. 

And my little boy who was a trooper today who put -up with all our girly stuff...

A new season of change...

So - change is upon me.

 I have felt it creeping in on my life, trying to rear its ugly head for a few weeks now.

  I've tried to put it out of my mind, to not think about it until I have to, and well - now I have to.

If you remember;  I don't do well with change.

So here they are, the new changes I'm still trying to wrap my head around..

Reason #1:

 My baby is 8 months old now....

He's getting bigger. His body looks long in my arms, When I look at him in sleeping in his crib he looks like he finally fits in it. 

He says " Da Da", he eats solids - like real food, our food.

 He rolls around the house, he crawls backwards..

And oh yea - 

He finally sleeps through the night.

I feel like his " baby - ness" is slipping away from me . I know what lies ahead in the growing bigger journey and I'm just not ready.  

But I can't slow down time so I'm gonna roll with it, and try to embrace what "growing older" will mean, to imagine what it will look like "then" and just know no matter how old my kids get, they we always be my babies. 

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Reason #2:

My BFF, my mommy friend, my sista from another motha, my maternity leave partner is going back to work tomorrow.

How will I get through the summer without her?!

We talk every morning, we text each other all day. We see one another at least three times a week. 

We do Mommy things, we have coffee dates, play dates. Random, spur of the moment stop by each other's house kinda things.

We really do everything together.

And I'm afraid life won't be the same without her. 

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Reason #3

Berry Season is just around the corner.

I'm pretty sure this is the latest season in history, so we are running on borrowed Daddy and husband time at the moment, and for that I am thankful.

But...

Life without him for 60 days straight, just flat out sucks.

I'm partly traumatized from last year when I was 8 and 9 months pregnant looking after Levi on my own. Having to be the house keeper,  do all the yard work, bring meals, etc. 

 It also didn't help that Levi, who doesn't handle being sick very well,  contracted hand, foot and mouth " disease" and some other random, weird virus later in August that I ended up contracting, that then spread to my eyes..

 I know blah blah blah- poor me...

But I wouldn't want to switch places with him - ever.

I'm thankful that at  least I get to stay at home with the kids, see them and spend time with them. 

Poor Steve doesn't, and he's already said to me how sad he is about all the things he's gonna miss out on.

But we have to remember; this is what pays the bills the rest of the year.

It provides the food we eat, the roof over our head, and gas in our tank. 

But I'm still gonna miss my other half.

My babies Daddy.

The one who helps bath kids, clean - up dinner, and snuggle little ones to sleep.

The one who teaches Levi how to golf and play hockey. 

Who runs around the house for hours playing hide and sneak.

The person who fill in the gaps, where I can not.

Pretty much, he's irreplaceable.

And I thank God for him everyday, because I know I'm so lucky.

And so are our kids.

So  here we are a new season of change...

I don't like it, but its inevitable so let it be.

But, still - Change sucks.

Life and Loss

The other night started out with me reading some of my favorite blogs.

Then I stumbled across this one - And I cried my eyes out.

And then I read this one and I couldn't imagine.

And then I thought about how much This blog's story affected me.

And then I remembered the 20/20 special I watched the other night about  this story so I read it too.

Whew, heavy stuff.

Steve was still away so I had a good cry in my room all by myself. 

I couldn't sleep and I knew what I needed was my babies.

I layed down next to Levi and just held him.

Then  I went into the nursery and  grabbed Dion.  I sat  in the rocking chair and I nestled his sleeping body against mine. I buried my face into his lil blonde downy hair, breathing in his familiar sweet baby smell.

And I thought about how I couldn't imagine my life without them in it.

I kept replaying all the tragic stories over and over in my mind.

I couldn't shake it. 

I'm the kind of person who can't handle watching the news.

When I hear sad stories, I'm traumatized for days.

I think its because I literally put myself in those people shoes.  

What if that was me? What if that happened to us? How would I feel? What would I do?How would I cope?

It's real life stuff that gets me, because its things that have happened to everyday normal, healthy, God - loving people, who are -

Just. Like. Me. 

Hardships don't discriminate, they may seem like they will " Never happen to us " 

But I know they can. 

So I am thankful.

When I was holding my D I cried and I thought:

 

I will never take my healthy lil boys for granted ever again.

 I thought about my flawless pregnancies and couldn't believe I could be so naive to what could happen.

I thought about how easily we conceived and realized how damn lucky we are.

I think about the story of  the Mom who got burned in the plane crash and I am so mad at myself for  ever feeling insecure about  my " imperfections."

I realized I sometimes wished Levi would stop talking so much

Needing so much of me

having so much energy. 

How I was tired of singing the  ABC's song over and over again with him.

How the baby kept me awake at night 

and wanted to be held all the time.

And I realized from now on

I would embrace it all...

 

Because I know it's how my children learn and grow.

And I guarantee any  Mother who have lost their child big or small  would wake up a million times a night, do anything to have them need all of them, just to have them alive and well.

And those who have children with special needs would  be ecstatic to have their little one talk non - stop , and to be able to run and play. 

And when I forget, and I'm frustrated

I'll remember  this.

And this.

And know I can carry on, and be grateful. 

For Gods most precious gift :

Their Life.

Things that have changed my life

Here are some things that have changed my life, things I couldn't live without now that I have them:

 My IPhone. 

For anyone who has one, I am sure you all would agree. 

Because I seriously don't know how I once lived without it!  Now I never get lost, I have my beloved notes right at my fingertips filled with my " to dos list,"  my kids milestones documented as soon as they happen, grocery list now never forgotten at home. 

The best part is the kids apps. In a split second on a verge of a meltdown moment, voila ! -  I have my apps which can transform any  cranky toddler. And really the list goes on and on, if you don't have one of these, stop living in the dark ages and go get one! 

 Jamie Oliver.

  I consider myself good at many things. Cooking however just wasn't one of my talents. In fact, I hated it. I would dread 4:00 when I knew I had to figure out what to try to make.

To give myself some credit, cooking for our little family isn't easy. That's because my husband is  a meat and potatoes kinda guy. He doesn't like : Tomatoes, mustard, peppers, whole wheat bread, any sort of squash, oh yea and onions.  

Me - I'm a vegetarian. 

So add that to a picky eater who doesn't like his veggies and you have one heck of a problem in the cooking department. 

That was until my best friend told me about this:

   

And now, we are forever changed! 

I look forward to cooking dinner, meal planning, and grocery shopping. 

And now we even enjoy cooking together, add a glass of wine to that and you have a jolly ol time!

The best part of it all, its healthy!! 

So go on now, jump on the band wagon and sign the petition HERE

 

 My PVR.

No more missed shows, fast forward commercials. 

LOVE

O.k before kids I vowed that I would never let my appearance slide. I would always take care of myself, I would never let things slide.

I would never wear " Mom" jeans, my eye brows would always be plucked, my nails always neat and polished.

Well there is dreaming and thinking one thing then there's reality. 

Some of the " I'll never's" I have managed to keep. 

But the nails polished thing -  out the window. 

Because it's just not possible. 

Try to feed or pick up a baby with half painted wet nails. Plus the fact that its totally time consuming. 

That was until I found this:

  

No more drying time, double coat, top coat and it chipping off the next day anyways mumbo jumbo. 

It's a lil pricey at $10 for a set. But if your going away or have a special event it's worth it!

Plus it lasts 10 days and goes on perfect, smooth like a fresh manicure. 

And the best part - you don't have to leave the house for it.

BAM! 

This Man.

I often wonder and think about where and who I would be had we never met. 

I know things don't happen just by chance, they have a purpose, reason and a plan that is so much bigger and profound  than we could ever imagine.

I realize how quick the path of my life can change should one simple thing not line up.

When I think about all the events that had that had to align for it all to be what it is now. 

I know he is meant for me and me for him.

 My Babies.

I never gave much thought to Motherhood before I had kids.

It's not something I dreamed about, or yearned for. 

I knew I wanted them and we talked about names for one day when....

 But I  was preoccupied with my Horse back riding, and I would always say  

" I like my life, why would I change it?" 

But obviously God had a plan that was different than my own. 

At the time I couldn't understand "why?"

 

Now I get it.

I thought I knew love before.

I thought love is what I felt for my horse, my dog.

Boy was I wrong.

Love, real love that changes you completely, that can be felt in the greatest depth of  your heart is found when you have children.

From the moment I became a Mother I was changed.

 

It was my " Aha" moment.

 

I understood my purpose, I saw life clearer, and I am complete.

Sometimes life is confusing, and there will always be times still when I'll ask " why??" 

But really I shouldn't because Gods plan and path for your life is always far better than your own. 

Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make your paths straight. (Proverbs 3:5-6)